God is One F*#ked Up Dude

There are very few things on this earth that get me rattled as much as crazy Christian speak.  As soon as I read something like, “It was God’s plan that we adopted this baby.  Thank you, Jesus!”, I feel like Mrs. White from Clue (see video below).

Let’s entertain this notion that God had something to do with you getting “your baby” for a moment.

Even in the best of circumstances in adoptoland, giving  away a baby is tragic.  Even if the mother has never had a second thought about giving you that baby, it is a TRAGEDY.  A baby not being raised by their mothers and fathers is a fucking CALAMITY!!! I’m not big on God, but let’s say he does exist.  So if it was God’s plan that you were able to adopt a baby, he planned for some poor, probably unwed mother to not have access to the resources she needed to raise her own child?  That kinda seems like a round-a-bout way of doing things, no?

If it was “God’s Plan” for you to have a baby, why not just knock you up??? Why did he make you infertile to begin with??? Seems like an awful waste of energy.  I bet you have a snappy comeback to that too…lemme guess…God works in mysterious ways?  BINGO!  Well, if that’s true, God is ONE FUCKED UP DUDE.

Please adoptive parents, I beg of you, spare the world your crazy Christian diatribes about how God chose you to parent our children.  It makes you sound like uneducated loony birds.  It also makes you seem inherently better than the mothers from which “your chosen children” came.  Like their mothers are somehow BAD and were punished so that oh-so-wonderful you could have the child you were chosen to raise.  It’s insulting.

It seems to me, and hey, I’m just spit-ballin’ here, that perhaps if your God truly does exist, that maybe he would want you to spend all that time and energy you’ve invested in procuring your “chosen child” into helping a mother raise her own child???? I’ve heard it takes a village. I could have sworn I’ve read a few things about that Jesus dude wanting all of us to help each other, but maybe I’m wrong.  It’s been quite a while since I’ve set foot in church.

I wonder if people really believe that God chose them to raise someone else’s child or if it’s just something they say to make themselves feel good about the horror of stripping a baby from his natural parents.  I guess it’s reassuring to believe that it was all part of God’s divine path, so I’ll say it again…God is one fucked up dude!

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6 comments

  1. addiepray

    Every time I hear the “God wanted us to have this baby” crap, I think the same thing, “Well why didn’t you get pregnant then?” Duh.
    At it’s heart I see this as the evangelical movement getting way out of hand, the whole concept of a personal relationship with God has become a selfish entitled thing. Apparently their belief they have been saved from eternal damnation isn’t enough, their God has to be wish granting genie too.

  2. leenilee

    It’s just maddening to me to hear God invoked all the time from certain groups. It implies that they are somehow inherently better than everyone else who didn’t have their prayers (wishes) answered. When I read or hear these things what I am ACTUALLY hearing is “nanny nanny poo poo! We got our wish and you DIDN’T” with a giant raspberry at the end. From what I know about Christianity, it just doesn’t seem in line with the teachings of Jesus or God. It’s like a big screw you to the rest of the world. Got what we wanted…pluububububububub (that is supposed to be a raspberry ha ha).
    Someday I hope to have the balls to respond to someone who says something like this in front of me. I would simply ask, what about the human being who had to sacrifice so that you could get your wish? Why didn’t your God grant their wish? I would honestly love to know the response. (Doesn’t even have to be adoption related)

  3. zygotepariah

    And sooooo . . . by extension, me being stripped of my name, two first families, my cultural heritage, my genetic medical history (and needing nine surgeries growing up, let me tell you how nice *that* was), genetic mirroring, a sense of belonging, my original birth certificate, etc. was also “God’s plan”?

    ‘Kay.

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